I should be starting to pack for our trip to Pismo... and being excited about going.
Yet, I can't get excited, even though I truly want to go.
See, my grandfather still isn't doing too well.
Friday night around 1130pm, my mom got a call from the doctors at the hospital and told her that she should make her way down to the bay area (where they live) because they weren't sure if my grandpa would make it through the night.
He did... thankfully.
So the kids and I got into the car on Saturday morning and headed down there... I needed and wanted to see him.
My grandfather not only has a broken hip, but his kidney's are shutting down, he has a UTI, a bacterial infection in his intestines and has sepsis (an infection in the blood stream).
My grandpa is 88 years old... a True American Hero... someone who doesn't deserve this... we always thought he'd go out in a fiery crash or in his sleep. We never thought he'd be in a hospital fighting for his life like this.
After having lunch with my parents, my brother and his fiance, and my grandmother, we went over to the hospital. Thankfully the kids stayed behind... if I had a hard time seeing him in his condition, Rowan would have too... although she truly understands that her Grandpa Ben is sick... very sick. She wanted to see him... but I'm now glad she didn't.
First of all, being in a hospital since Zachary's situation, it always brings back memories. Seeing the equipment, understanding what the numbers mean and what not... takes me right back.
So not only did I get emotional from seeing my grandfather in his situation... I was remembering dealing with Zach's and got all emotional from that too.
My grandpa wasn't really responsive the first time I went into his room... I went next to his bed and said Hi Grandpa. His eyes kinda flickered open but that was about it. I told him that I loved him and then I broke down. Of course, when my mom saw me like that, she broke down too... so I had to leave the room.
It took me a good 10 mins before I got up the strength to see him again...
I'm glad I went back in there though. This time, he tried with all his might to communicate with me and everyone else. I said Hi Grandpa again and this time he really opened his eyes... I grabbed his hand and told him if he could hear me, to squeeze it. And he did :) That made me cry of course... but I stayed next to him for a good 30 mins talking to him.
He tried to tell us that his mouth was hurting. I think it is because he is dehydrated. His tongue is swollen and has some sores on it. They do this thing that swabs his mouth... and after us trying to get him to talk we finally figured out that he wanted something done about his mouth.
When we told him that we loved him, he tried to tell us that he loved us back... but it was too hard on him. When I told him they were going to be moving him to isolation, he raised his eyebrows... he does this look where if he acts surprised, he raises his eyebrows. It was good to see him doing something like that.
He just looks so old and fragile. Granted, he is 88 years old... I know he is old. Yet, it was extremely hard on us... on me... My grandpa is my hero... or shall I say one of them.
He made it through last night too...
I called my mom this morning to get an update- they are heading down there again- and his status hasn't changed.
His blood pressure is really low... 88/44... and he still sleeps most of the time. I hope that when my mom gets to talk to the doctors he'll have some better news.
Please continue to keep him in your thoughts... It really means a lot to know you all care so much.
I guess I should start doing some stuff to get ready for our trip to Pismo- yes, we are still going... if anything major happens while we are gone, we'll be notified and I'll be heading there asap!!
We leave tomorrow morning... so you won't be seeing me for a while... it should be a good trip... if I can keep my mind of fun. The weather is supposed to be pretty mild and only some showers on Tuesday.
I hope you all have a wonderful Sunday and a great week...
Hugs to all,
~Pickle Jenn~
(See Nae... told you I had you beat for worst days ever... lol)
18 comments:
Yikes.
Just go, try to enjoy yourself and keep positive. If you're not, no one else will be and you'll be upset that you even went.
One day at a time, kiddo. Other than the hip, it sounds like my grandparents ailments, combined...your poor Grandpa :(
****POSITIVE HEALING VIBES COMING YOUR WAY****
~V~
try and have a wonderful trip. It sure sounds like your grandpa is a fighter. I'll be praying.
I am sure your grandfather wouldn't want you sitting around and worrying about him instead of taking your trip with your children. Going on your trip is the best thing for all of you right now. I am sure he loved having you there to visit with him and you brightened his day by being there. You have a guarantee that I will keep him in my prayers and healing wishes.
Much love to you,
Lisa
I will pray for you grandfather's recovery. What your grandfather is doing reminds me of my dad of did. My dad would sleep all the time, be really tired, not eating anything, etc. My dad was battling cancer it would have been four years at the end of this month. But Tuesday February 28th my dad died in the hospital while my mom and I were there visiting him. My dad would have been 64 in April. I will be 21 in October. Even though right now it is hard on the family we know for my dads sake that it is better off that he is not here anymore because he was in for more pain and suffering. But enough about my dad. Like I said before I will pray for you grandfather and your family.
Have fun on your family vacation.
Lauren
I am so sorry hon..you and your grandpa are in my prayers.
Oh (((((Jenn)))))
Reading this brought back many many memories of my last couple weeks
with my aunt, I know all to well what you are going through...especially him barely opening is eyes at one time, dry mouth with sores...and knowing he can hear you...but can't speak back....everything i went through with my aunt Judy...We tried to keep her mouth moist ~ but she slept with her mouth somewhat open so that was hard....cause she slept ALOT. I can't say anything to make things any better, i wish that i could....Just know that we are always here for you! You, your family...and grandpa are in my thoughts... Keep ur chin up =)
Hugss..~Terri~
Try to have fun on your trip!!! I'll continue to keep your Grandpa in my prayers..
((Jennifer))
~Jenn~
http://journals.aol.com/icewitch96/JennsWorld
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandpa. This Wed, the 15th, will be the 6th anniversary of my dad's death. He was only 62 when he died. He was a very social, fun-loving, generous, compassionate guy who would always make people laugh and feel welcome. So, I am sure he is a real pro when it comes to heaven by now so I have asked him to take special care of your grandpa when he arrives...whenever that may be. I know my dad, and he will go out of his way to make sure Grandpa has a fantastic welcoming! Try to remember, those that have gone before us are having an awesome time, with no pain and no heartache and no misery so although you will miss your grandpa, he's going on to a bigger and better place.
Try and hang in there and enjoy your trip if you can. Let us know how everything turns out.
Jeanne
http://journals.aol.com/candlejmr/AJourneytoaNewMe/
HI. you dont know me, but one time i found your journal and have started reading it from time to time. When i saw this latest one about your grandpa, i knew i had to say something because it reminded me so much of my last moments with my grandpa who passed away 3 years ago this past January. I hope your grandpa takes a turn for the better and will soon be able to go back to his resident care facility. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts.
Jennifer
Hi Jenn,
I will keep your grandfather in my prayers. And all of your family too. I know how hard this is to see a loved one in pain and to be strong too. Sending love and thoughts your way.
Lisa
http://journals.aol.com/randlprysock/AdventuresFromFlorida/
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this tough time....it's so hard to see them struggle and so very fragile. I'm glad you had the time to spend with him, to talk to him and for him to respond to you. :)
Have an enjoyable trip and be careful!
Michele
http://journals.aol.com/samnsmile5/Lettingitallsinkin
Jenn stay strong...
I'll continue to keep all of you in prayer
take care
and have some fun in pismo take a few pictures :)
<3, emily
I'll certainly be keeping your grandpa in my prayers.
Trust me, I empathize. I remember trying to talk to my grandad during his last days...it was awful. He never even got to meet my kids.
I hope you have a wonderful time in Pismo!
XO,
bridgett
Prayers being sent your families way. Losing loved ones is always hard...I hope he hangs on for as long as he possibly can! Enjoy your trip.
That's too bad about your Grandpa. I deal with those situations all the time working in the ICU. Sometimes, patients families won't even come out to see them and they have to go through the illness all alone. Your Grandpa is lucky to have such a supportive family.
Hi. I just started AOL journals and love to read the fun things people have going on in their lives. I remember reading an entry of yours a few weeks ago and have been hooked since, so much so that I had to read all of the entries you've made just so I could "catch up." I wanted to wish your grandfather the best, you guys will be in my thoughts and I hope he starts to feel better. Leene
Bless your heart, I am late getting by here, but I sure hope that your grandpa is doing better and that you are getting to enjoy your little trip.
I can't wait to see pictures and updates.
Love ya,
Kathi
I'm sorry that I'm late getting here. Know that you're all in my thoughts and prayers. It's so hard to deal with watching a loved one suffer.
Luv~Heather
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